A Toast

Something in the way we never said goodbye 

Or good luck with your future life

Is keeping me from moving on

And every angry word I shouted out

Is slowly coming back around

A burden that I face alone 

And every regret stinging in the 

Vows you made in May

To someone I will never be

Another chance is gone

So I will make a toast

To forget every ghost of your return

And help me learn

To let it go 

Here’s to all the things we never said

And days of silent time well spent

And lessons learned to never wait too long

And here’s to all the beauty that I left you with

To carry on with someone else and

Here’s to you

Here’s to you

Every time you look into her eyes

I wonder if you realize

That I’m the only one who ever knew

I got inside your head 

And made sense of the mess and

Showed you how to love the very best

Part of you 

CHORUS

BRIDGE

And every time I find some piece of mind

The memory of us haunts me

You’re coming back to haunt me now

I know I have a life 

You have a wife

And time’s gone by 

And it’s all over now

I know that it’s all over now

But I can’t forget you

Copyright  © 2009 Renee Winter

Alive

This is your life

What are you waiting for

A sign to say everything’s safe

Close your eyes

See the world outside the walls that you’ve been building

And make it yours today

CHORUS

And I don’t want to go

Where I know only happiness is waiting

I might never be strong again

And I don’t want to see

All the easy ways to what I’m hoping to find

I want to be alive

Feed the fire

Feel the rain outside your window

The haze of all the yesterdays gone

Be inspired

Learn to break out of your mold

Embrace the empty when you’re feeling alone

CHORUS

You’ve waited so long

The past is gone

The future is only an illusion

You’re here and now

So take a bow

Breathe it in

Catch the light

Today you are alive

CHORUS

Copyright  © 2006 Renee Winter

All Right

Baby don’t wait up for me tonight

Yeah, I’m here but I’m already out of your life

Strange how the emptiness feels right

After years of being afraid 

Baby, I’m all right

I am stronger now

I don’t need your help

‘Cause I’ve made a peace within myself

Now I know I can

Carry on

Years went by where the past was all I had

Too afraid to let things go and leave it all to chance

It’s everything you fear that makes you whole

It took all the love in the world to let it go

I am stronger now

I don’t need your help

‘Cause I’ve made a peace within myself

And now I know 

You won’t always know just where to find yourself

When yesterday is gone

Today will be your everything

Hold on to only what you know    

You’ll be free to be alive

When you’re free to live your life

Alone

So carry on

Carry on

Carry on your life is your own

Let it go

Let it go

Oh carry on

Strange how the emptiness feels right

After years of being afraid

Copyright  © 2007 Renee Winter

Because of You (Dad)

You taught me to never lose that sense of wonder

Seen only through the eyes of a child

From playing games

To crawling underneath the table

You showed me love with a laugh and a smile

You were always there to lend a helping hand

And I know you’ll always be my biggest fan

There’s a million lonely miles between my heart and my home

But when I see you in my own eyes then I know I’m not alone

Because of you I live with dreams in my eyes

Because of you I see the magic in life

And now I know

I’m glad that I’ve got a friend and dad

Who makes me proud of everything I am

  I’ll always treasure our long conversations

And every summer day that’s come and gone

A man who’s been through everything 

But gives so much to the world

I’m proud of everything you’ve ever done

We’ve made a lifetime full of memories so far

Like the time we threw the fruit out of the car

There’s a million lonely miles between my heart and my home

But when I see you in my own eyes then I know I’m not alone

Because of you I live with dreams in my eyes

Because of you I see the magic in life

And now I know

I’m glad that I’ve got a friend and dad

Who makes me proud of everything I am

Because of you I see the music in me

Because of you I can love completely

I’m never alone

I’m glad that I’ve got a friend and dad

Who makes me proud of everything I am

You make me proud of who I am

Copyright  © 2007 Renee Winter

Breaking Out

I want to be light

Want to hear all the heartbreak hits

On the airwaves tonight

I want to be free

Feel the rain on my face and

Wasting away with the night

I wanna react

Wanna wade in the gray

Unafraid if I’ll ever come back

I need to feel your love

Suffocating love

Reckless sating love

I’m breaking out

From the walls that you put me in

I begin to fall down

I’m reaching in

To a heart that is waiting

In dark for a spark to begin

I’m screaming out loud

For a dangerous night

Wanna run wanna fight you again

I’m letting go

Of the innocent eyes

And the lie that we’re never alone

 I need to feel your love

Suffocating love

Reckless sating love

Falling downward

Drowning

Love, your words are everything

(can save me)

I need to feel your love

Suffocating love

Lie in waiting love

Cold sedating love

Infiltrating love

Reckless sating love

Copyright  © 2006 Renee Winter

Chaos

Oh, say can you see them

As they wait for us to save them

It’s too late

We’re busy fighting just

For our own sense of pride

What a perfect day  

When one gives way 

To love and love equates to hate

When someone’s brave enough

To wade through all the lies

When will we go beyond what is known

Is there anyone here who cares anymore

What we’ve done, what we do will (can) not be ignored

And the (your) future will suffer the lie

That we are free

From the corner of my eye

I see a sign saying “Unwelcome”

Go away you are not wanted

You don’t need a better life

There’s a man and man who suffer

For another who would rather see

Them falter than recover

Who will stand up for their right?

As the hate rings out tonight

All we do is close our minds

To the madness that unfolds in waves

Right before our eyes

As you’re warm and safe tonight

Think of all who we’ve left behind

And know your rights

While you are free

Copyright  © 2006 Renee Winter

Crazy Man Song

And I fell out of love with you

When you threw away my shoes

And you broke my radio 

And smashed my phone

What was I supposed to do?

Just hang around for you?

It’s a shame you went insane

But I found my way back home 

20 messages in one hour

An angry letter with my flowers

You should’ve known the crazy act

Was not the way to bring me back

What was I supposed to do?

Just hang around for you?

It’s a shame you went insane

But I found my way back home 

BRIDGE 

She was only 16 

We would fight and you would call her on the phone

And I knew that song wasn’t for me

It was reused for every girl you’ve ever known

You kept lying and I know

You were never at the studio

When you called me crying from her home

I laughed ‘cause I was not alone

What was I supposed to do?

Just hang around for you?

It’s a shame you went insane

But I found my way back home 

Copyright  © 2009 Renee Winter

Diamond Ring

Oh, I never asked for your soul

Only a way to get home

If you never wanted me then

You could’ve said so

In your apartment at nine

Sharing a bottle of wine

Fingertips all intertwined

I wonder why?

I never asked for a diamond ring

I didn’t want much of anything

I would’ve loved to love you

For the night

Head spinning ‘round and I had it bad

Anything you wanted you could have

But it never happened

And oh I wonder why

I was all off in a daze

Wishing that I would’ve stayed

Living it back play by play

The way it went on

I never asked for your heart

Only some deep conversation

I should have known from the start

You’d lead me on

CHORUS

Why I wasted so much hope

And losing faith and

Something that was all for show

I’m finding hard to let it go

Oh why?

CHORUS

Copyright  © 2009 Renee Winter

Don't Cry

I’m standing in line

For something I know was never mine

I’m letting you go

For reasons I hope you’ll never know

 

I’m learning your lies

Believing them right before your eyes

I’m letting you think you win

For everything lost you’ll gain again

So don’t break down in front of me

Don’t cry, don’t cry

I’ve already lost my mind

Let go and set me free

Don’t cry, don’t cry

And keep it all between you and me

I’m leading you on

Even though our love is dead and gone

I’m staying away

You don’t deserve the time of day

I’m owning the night

Blurring the lines of wrong and right

I’m giving you a chance to leave

And go before I make another scene

So don’t break down in front of me

Don’t cry, don’t cry

I’ve already lost my mind

Let go and set me free

Don’t cry, don’t cry

And keep it all between you and me

Can’t you see I’m wearing down

From all this time spent running ‘round

My energy is wearing thin

The back and forth is driving me in –

CHORUS

Copyright  © 2009 Renee Winter

Finally Free

You never let them break you

You never flinched at all

Everything is gray

Now that you’re gone

I never saw it coming

It got the best of you

City lights and dreams often do

Find the light of your own

You can see that everything under the sun

Is all you’ll be leaving

And then you will be

Finally free

Finally 

You’ve lost your golden words and

What’s left are memories

Beauty lost in 

Everything you seek

You should have told me

I’ve been through

More than you’ll ever knew

Couldn’t love enough to save your soul

Find the light of your own

You can see that everything under the sun

Is all you’ll be leaving

And then you will be

Finally free

Copyright  © 2008 Renee Winter

Goodbye Tonight

Goodbye my friend

Whatever happens tonight

You’re in my head

But you’re a waste of my time

Too much of nothing 

And not a damn thing in sight

So goodbye to you

Goodbye tonight

Goodbye young one

You know it’s fun when you’re around  

But too much of you

Can leave a woman feeling down

Oh no there ain’t nothin’

That I can say to make it right, but

Goodbye to you

Goodbye tonight

Goodbye to lost life

Goodbye to wasted time

You’re one I won’t forget but

I’m done with losing myself to the night

Goodbye to nothingness

Goodbye to fear of flight

Goodbye to old regrets

Hello to life

Copyright  © 2008 Renee Winter

Hollywood Nights

At the end of the day at the Hotel Cafe 

Let the music flow over and take you away

As the guy with the guitar

Plays love from his heart

And the lucky ones smile

‘Cause they roll with the stars

And you’re fighting to see as you stand in the back

And you wonder if they can see all that you lack

Realize that their lives aren’t the shiniest prize

Raise a toast to how fragile we are

Hollywood nights 

Feel so alive

But deep underneath we’re all broken inside

It’s a complex illusion

We’re more or less human

And everyone wicked and wise

Come to hide in these Hollywood nights

Do you ever feel despised in a room full of eyes

Who don’t ever take notice unless you collide 

And you cover your face ‘cause you’re so out of place

But they’re hiding theirs too ‘cause they’re feeling the same

And you wonder what magical things they’re all saying

Behind the red curtain while music is playing

A strange paradise as they swim in their vice

Raise a toast to how fragile we are

CHORUS

Raise your glass to them all as they’re stumbling by

With their champagne and candy and wavering eyes

And a smile to the girl in the corner alone

And be happy that you’re going home

Hollywood nights

Feel so alive

But deep underneath we’re all broken inside

It’s a complex illusion

We’re more or less human

And everyone wicked and wise

Come to hide in these Hollywood nights

Copyright  © 2009 Renee Winter

Just Like You (Mom)

This is who I am

Wondering who I’ll be

Knowing on the way

That you’re a part of me

As far as I can tell

Life keeps moving on

You’ll always be my hero, Mom

For everything you’ve done

Sharing the laughter over the years

Never too tired to stop and play

Saving the brightest smile for the tears

And though we’re miles away

I want you to know you’re always with me

Wherever I go you’re right beside

And I will remember all you sacrificed

To help me live my life

Letting me find my way in my own world

Caring for your little girl

Who’s growing up to be a woman who

Is just like you

Many moving days

Changes in our lives

We always had each other 

Knowing it would be all right

Time and time again

In searching for a friend

You were never far and in my heart

Is where you’ve always been

Sharing the laughter over the years

Never too tired to stop and play

Saving the brightest smile for the tears

And though we’re miles away

I want you to know you’re always with me

Wherever I go you’re right beside

And I will remember all you sacrificed

To help me live my life

Letting me find my way in my own world

Caring for your little girl

Who’s growing up to be a woman who

Is just like you

I’m lucky that I am woman who

Is just like you

Copyright  © 2008 Renee Winter